“The pinnacle of dad rock”: This survey claims to have identified the ultimate dad rock band – but there was some surprising competition

A new survey has crowned Nickelback as the ultimate dad rock band, but the rest of the top 10 list might make for scary reading for some. 

In a new piece of highly important scientific musical analysis, merch website Merchoid asked 3,000 Americans a simple question: 'Which band truly epitomizes dad rock today?’ – and Nickelback stormed the results. 

The Canadian outfit claimed 26% of the vote. That put them comfortably ahead of the guitar acrobatics of Van Halen and the joyous pop-punk of blink-182, who shared second spot with 12% of the votes. 

Those who grew up with blink-182 will probably agree with Van Halen’s inclusion, but they probably never thought their childhood classics would be dad-ified. Times, as Bob Dylan once said, are a-changing. 

Merchoid also asked poll-takers to name the ultimate dad rock banger, and Chad Kroeger’s merry men once again took the honors. 

How You Remind Me had competition from classic tracks like Smells Like Teen Spirit, Sweet Child O’ Mine, and Van Halen’s euphoric Jump – but it proved dad-ier than the rest. 

The survey then mapped out which dad rock bands reigned supreme in each state. In a surprise to no one, the Kings of California, Red Hot Chili Peppers, were crowned the, er, Kings of California. 

Van Halen claimed a North East stronghold in states like Wisconsin, Michigan, and Indiana, while North and South Dakota were split between Linkin Park and Coldplay – the only British band on the map.    

The survey’s results were also tinged with nostalgia, with 57% believing that today’s music is worse than the jams of yesteryear. A mere 3% fly the flag for contemporary artists – Swifties, we’re looking at you – and 40% called it a draw. 

The ‘80s acts among the list also got away with being branded with the ‘grandad rock’ tag, as 86% of respondents associated the term with ‘60s bands – and a wild 6% linked it to the grunge era. Indeed, 41% say listeners ‘become out of touch with modern music’ at 35.  

That means if you got Avenged Sevenfold's Nightmare or Deftones' Diamond Eyes on CD for your 21st birthday, then 2024 is the year you can first say "back in my day" with true conviction. Yikes. 

Head to Merchoid to pour over the full survey results.